Monday, January 30, 2012

beginning of a new week.

Now that we are just about in the month of February and the end of Jan. hmm what's new? Mike got his tunnel cathater for dialysis on Weds last week and then Saturday, he started his first day. He came home and slept most of the day. Sunday he was a bit laid back. We didn't make it to church and I didn't want to push it. But by this morning he seemed to look good and he said he felt good. We went to the surgeon's office today for a follow up. He told Mike that the veins in the left arm were not well enough to do the fistula. So now he has to go back Weds. and get a veno-gram on the right arm to see if it's better. Then have another follow up next monday..
Fun fun fun!! I know we've just started in the dr's appts and such, but man, I'm tired now, can you imagine when it all kicks into gear at once. I'm doomed.. He will be just the same. I just have more on my plate.. he just sits back and gets rides and shows up for what is needed. I have to scout for sitters and make sure Jenai has her kids squared away and such.. None are my kids and I worry so.. how come?? I just feel bad b/c they are my job (so to speak) and when you can't make your shift, you tend to find someone else to fill in for you. That is how I think about the kids.
But usually I'm blessed to know that I have such great family and friends here in Crestview and they are always there to jump and help when needed. Thnak GOD for that.. What more could we ask for...
Been reading daily in the Bible twice if I can morning and night and alot of times if I'm in the Dr's office waiting for Mike on something I will try and read some also. I'm not in Ecclesiates.. I'm so excited. I'm actually going to complete the book in no time at all and I'll be able to say, " I've read the WORD cover to cover." I've never done that before. I'm so excited about that. I then will be picking up a study guide and really going to study the Bible and get into it to learn it.. That I'm really wanting to do, but swore I wouldn't until I've conquered the entire book reading it first..
Kyla has picked up the word Ya'll it's so funny. She had a bag of gummy worms that she was eating for a snack..She calls them dummy worms. LOL and still calls lollipops, wee pops. I love it.. love it love it..

Wednesday, January 25, 2012

news update ending of January

Well, Mike went for his chest Xray and veno-gram. He now goes tomorrow to Pensacola to get his chest Cath. so he may begin dialysis Saturday Morning. My poor guy is getting more and more depressed and the day come on. I feel so badly for him. All I can do is pray for him and let God fill his voids and love him through it all.
Today I went to my Dr and asked for something to help with my depression/anxiety. I've had my due. Sometimes, it's easier to allow some help then try to conqueor life all alone. Dr also thinks it will help me in the long run while taking the Lyrica with the Prozac, that it should work better together and help more. He also referred me to the pain clinic so I can try and work better with the Lortabs and Flexeral. He's worried about me taking too much. I think I do very well. I take one to two Tabs a day and my ten mg Flex. I take 1/2 tab at bedtime. When I have a really major flare up, I will take a tab and a whole flex to get through. But that is a rare occassion...If there is something out there that is better then those, then by all means, I will try them. But until they can find anything, I'm sticking to what I'm doing now.. What more can I do?
Had plans to head to church tonight. But when service starts at 6:30 and I just can't push myself to making on time. We missed out once again. But we've been doing pretty well on making Sundays.
I've done very well on my 21 day chocolate and junk fast. I've had no chocolate, no ice cream, no junk food. My only junk flaw all day has been coffee with flavored creamer. I drink a travel mug a day and at most a mug before that one. Usually it's only the travel mug. For my midnight snacking, if I'm awake at that time, is veggie crackers by wheat thins or wheat thins. I do have rice cakes in my snack drawer, but I've not touched them since I bought them.
This will help me lose some poundage. I got on the scale at the Dr's clinic today and was like OH BOY!!!! The Dr tried to make me feel better by telling me that he has so many patients that would give my weight and for my blood panels.. I had great blood panels. My cholesteral is a bit high but not too much to worry. He said to start taking Omega 3's and it should start coming back down. I said, yep and along with my 21 day fast of junk will help totally also.. LOL he was amazed that I was doing that and proud in the long run also.. how cool is that??
Oh well, that's about all that is new right now.. Update more laters....

Friday, January 20, 2012

not so great news...

Mike had a Dr's appt today at the kidney Dr. He had to go alone today b/c someone had to stay home with the kids. His appt was at 3:30. Around 4:30 the dr's nurse calls me to inform me that Mike will be needing to begin dialysis next week. He is too sick to wait for the fistula placement and the three month wait for it to heal. So he will be going soon in for the surgical placement tube for peritoneal dialysis:
In this type of dialysis, your blood is cleaned inside your body. The doctor will do surgery to place a plastic tube called a catheter into your abdomen (belly) to make an access. During the treatment, your abdominal area (called the peritoneal cavity) is slowly filled with dialysate through the catheter. The blood stays in the arteries and veins that line your peritoneal cavity. Extra fluid and waste products are drawn out of your blood and into the dialysate. There are two major kinds of peritoneal dialysis
Then in time if he is able to do so he can get the surgery to have the hemodialysis which then he can have dialysis at home:
In hemodialysis, an artificial kidney (hemodialyzer) is used to remove waste and extra chemicals and fluid from your blood. To get your blood into the artificial kidney, the doctor needs to make an access (entrance) into your blood vessels. This is done by minor surgery to your arm or leg.

Sometimes, an access is made by joining an artery to a vein under your skin to make a bigger blood vessel called a fistula.

However, if your blood vessels are not adequate for a fistula, the doctor may use a soft plastic tube to join an artery and a vein under your skin. This is called a graft.

Occasionally, an access is made by means of a narrow plastic tube, called a catheter, which is inserted into a large vein in your neck. This type of access may be temporary, but is sometimes used for long-term treatment.
He may also be a candidate for a kidney transplant. He has a few people in line for donation. We had four, but one ended up with kidney stones like I have and can't do it now. Out of the three that are left, one is his sister. She may possibly be the closests in being a match. If none of them are a match he will be on a waiting list. This can take up to ten years to reach availability.
In the meantime we are asking for all the prayers we can get. This can be very tireing for Mike and he can be sick with it all. It's a really rough treatment. He will start by going to the dialysis clinic three times a week for four hour days. That is enough to make anyone tired.
My heart breaks for him. I so wish I could do all this for him. I have enough ailments, what is it to add another. I know it's so rough on him. I know it bothers him to be in this state. He is always the tough, strong bred earner. He is the care taker, not the one being taking care of. So it's rough. So please keep him in your prayers.
I pray for myself for strength. I am not the healthiest. I have my own issues. I need to be able to put aside my issues and be strong to maintain, not only taking care of him, but now taking care of the babies alone, while Melissa works. She is our biggest financial help. We depend on her for that. So I need to be able to take care of the girls while she works. Granted we have a nurse that deals with kaylee. But they are not always here. There are days when a nurse can't be. So it's up to me to take over that. I have to give up my time at the shop. I'm not sure about the driving of the kids Tues-Fridays. I may be able to take Kyla with me each day. But must be home in time for kaylee to get off the bus at 3:50 each day. Have to be available to get Mike to dialysis and pick him up those three days a week. And until Melissa gets her truck fully running, I will have to transport her to and from work. So yes, I pray for strength and endurance to get through this until some things ease up...
In Jesus name I pray and in His name I ask for all this. And with faith I know that NOTHING is too big to ask of Him. So I thank Him in advance for all my answered prayers.. Amen...

Wednesday, January 18, 2012

A new year, New Resolutions

I'm not really big on New Years Resolutions. Especially b/c that way if I don't keep up with the Res. then I know I haven't failed. LOL I'm not one to finish too much of things I started. I start crafts and usually don't complete them, I start a diet and I quit part way through, I plan on reading so many book in a year, but then I only get a bit of a way through that. I promised I would read the Bible completely through in a year and fail in the time frame.
This year I'm trying to set goal that I may accomplish. I still want to finish reading the Bible to its end, I still want to lose weight, I still want to read books(just not setting a number on what I want to read). I do want to keep on the main frame of reading spiritual uplifting books. I'm totally enjoying the learning of it all.
One huge goal on concentrating on is, I want to become closer to my Father in heaven then I have ever been. I want the father/daughter relationship like none other. I want the feeling of sitting on "daddy's lap" kind of relationship. So I have made it known that I'm looking for books that will and can get me spiritually intune with the spirit to guide me there.
As far as the weight loss. I took on the challange that we were given at church, of a 21 day fast. You are to chose something that you want to abstain from for 3 weeks and pray about it.. So I took on the challange of abstaining from midnight chocolate. I've stocked my draws with rice cakes, wheat thins and veggy crackers, so I won't be tempted. I've been so good about it that I've actually abstained from chocolate and sweets from my day time also. The true thing of sugar really that I've had is only in my coffee (2 tsp) The only chocolate I've gotten is white chocolate coffee creamer. I'm so proud of myself..
We are then to pick someone in Crestview to pray for salvation. I took on the task of two. B/c I knew that they are such a close knit couple that they would have to come together to be saved, instead of seperately.
It all follows suit to these ideas on how to do it..

He gave us 6 keys for setting yourself up for success....
1)set your prayer objectives. Write them down! Trust God! Declare your dependence on him and make him first. Ask him to point out the areas of your life that is unpleasant to him. Believe God for the great fulfillment of Crestview winning the lost!
James 4:2-3
2 You desire but do not have, so you kill. You covet but you cannot get what you want, so you quarrel and fight. You do not have because you do not ask God. 3 When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures.
2) decide what type of fasting you will do
Matthew 6:16-18
16 Simon Peter answered, “You are the Messiah, the Son of the living God.”

17 Jesus replied, “Blessed are you, Simon son of Jonah, for this was not revealed to you by flesh and blood, but by my Father in heaven. 18 And I tell you that you are Peter,[a] and on this rock I will build my church, and the gates of Hades[b] will not overcome it.

Footnotes:a.Matthew 16:18 The Greek word for Peter means rock.
b.Matthew 16:18 That is, the realm of the dead
3) make it a heart thing not a food thing
Joel 2:12-13
Rend Your Heart
12 “Even now,” declares the LORD,
“return to me with all your heart,
with fasting and weeping and mourning.”
13 Rend your heart
and not your garments.
Return to the LORD your God,
for he is gracious and compassionate,
slow to anger and abounding in love,
and he relents from sending calamity.
4) put to death the flesh. Fasting separates us from things of the flesh. The goal of Christianity is that the spirit man be in charge fasting and prayer denies the flesh and the souless man but strengthens the spirit man
Romans 8:13
13 For if you live according to the flesh, 3 ‘Why have we fasted,’ they say,
‘and you have not seen it?
Why have we humbled ourselves,
and you have not noticed?’
5) choose a different lifestyle don't do the same things you've always done. Change it up!
Isaiah 58:3
3 ‘Why have we fasted,’ they say,
‘and you have not seen it?
Why have we humbled ourselves,
and you have not noticed?’

“Yet on the day of your fasting, you do as you please
and exploit all your workers.

6) expect results! Expect changes
Isaiah 58:8-9
8 Then your light will break forth like the dawn,
and your healing will quickly appear;
then your righteousness[a] will go before you,
and the glory of the LORD will be your rear guard.
9 Then you will call, and the LORD will answer;
you will cry for help, and he will say: Here am I.

“If you do away with the yoke of oppression,
with the pointing finger and malicious talk,
(8) the rightous one
It's one thing to love God and another to be In Love with God! So are you in love with God?
Revelations 2:4-6
4 Yet I hold this against you: You have forsaken the love you had at first. 5 Consider how far you have fallen! Repent and do the things you did at first. If you do not repent, I will come to you and remove your lampstand from its place. 6 But you have this in your favor: You hate the practices of the Nicolaitans, which I also hate.
Remember your first love, remove the obsticals (repent)
God commands to bring us back to him!
1) remember your first love
2) remove the obsticals
3) rejoin the path of obedience

So all in all, everything I wanted was taught in that Sunday. How awesome is that? How to get closer to the Father is in alot of what is written above. So I have taken on this challenge. Sunday past, it was taught also in making God first you must put Him first. When you wake in the morning, don't roll over and turn on TV or hit your facebook, as I do. I roll over and grab my phone and see if I have any texts or messages. Then, of course, I must click on FB and look and see all the newness of the day. NO, we must thank our Father for being able to open our eyes another day and ask our blessings and give thanks in advance for our needs. Pick up your Bible and read for a few moments before you begin your day.. This is very difficult for me..I'm still trying to adjust this. I check phone, then go bathroom, then give thanks to our Father. I leave my reading for later in the day or even just before bed at night. Maybe if I read before I started my day and also before I actually end my day. I may just get the closeness that I'm desiring..
Anyway, try it. It is a promise from our Father in Heaven that if you ask you will receive. He does tell us, "I never said it would be easy, just that it would be worth it." (may not be verbatum) I was told while growing up, if you wished to speak to God, you must pray. If you want God to speak to you, you must read the Bible. But there actually comes a time while working toward all this, that you can spiritually speak to the Father in a back and fort conversation. That is the conversation I am aiming toward in getting.. How about you???